Cigarettes & Cheap Champagne

but also this.

 I’ve hardly been outside my room in days,
‘cause I don’t feel that I deserve the sunshine’s rays.
The darkness helped until the whiskey wore away,
And it was then I realized the conscience never fades.
When you’re young you have this image of your life:
That you’ll be scrupulous and one day even make a wife.
And you make boundaries you’d never dream to cross,
And if you happen to you wake completely lost.
But I will fight for you, be sure that
I will fight until we’re the special two once again.

And we will only need each other, we’ll breathe together,
Our hands will not be taught to hold another’s,
When we’re the special two.
And we could only see each other, we’ll bleed together,
These arms will not be taught to need another,
‘Cause we were the special two.

I remember someone old once said to me:
“That lies will lock you up with truth the only key.”
But I was comfortable and warm inside my shell,
And couldn’t see this place would soon become my hell.
So is it better to tell and hurt or lie to save their face?
Well I guess the answer is don’t do it in the first place.
I know I’m not deserving of your trust from you right now,
But if by chance you change your mind you know I will not let you down
‘cause we were the special two, and we’ll be again.

And we will only need each other, we’ll breathe together,
Our hands will not be taught to hold another’s,
When we’re the special two.
And we can only see each other we’ll bleed together,
These arms will not be taught to need another…
‘cause we’re the special two.

I step outside my mind’s eye’s for a minute.
And I look over me like a doctor looking for disease,
Or something that could ease the pain.
But nothing cures the hurt you, you bring on by yourself,
Just remembering, just remembering how we were…

When we would only need each other, we’d breathe together,
Our hands would not be taught to hold another’s,
We were the special two.
And we could only see each other, we’d bleed together,
These arms would not be taught to need another,
‘Cause we’re the special two.

but mostly, all of this:

Looking out across suburban yards to the construct of our days through the thinning of the trees.
Why can I only build a house of cards?
That gets blown to pieces with the fall’s first fickle breeze.
When I feel that stirring, the illicit kiss.
That’s just the cool tongue of the devil with a sucker in his midst.

One day I’ll change you’ll be the first one that I call.
I owe you an apology, too many thanks and that’s not all.
I’ve been running long before I learned to crawl.
My calendar lies crumbled laid to waste.
It’s been scrawled on, thumbed through and changed.
Will this be the measure of my days?
Dinners and appointments and deadlines I can’t make.
And when I start to see I start to see it making sense for me.
That’s just hope springing eternally.

[and I’ll be yours to keep]

darling I feel you under my body
darling you’re with me forever and always
give me shelter or show me heart
and watch me fall apart, watch me fall apart.  

well tell her that I miss our little talks.

And I know, I know, I know
It’s true.
And I know, I know, I know
We were exactly where we wanted to be.

So kiss me, kiss me.
Do it like you did before.
Kiss me, kiss me.
Caramia mi amor.

And I’ll breathe you in again.
And I’ll hold you so close to my skin.

Kiss Me - Sick of Sarah